15 WAYS TO STOP NAGGING AND GET WHAT YOU WANT

Nagging has a couple of explicit definitions that help us truly understand its concept. It is the act of causing continual or reoccurring worry, pain, discomfort, or anxiety.

It is also persistently annoying or finding fault in someone. In interpersonal communication, nagging is persistent behaviour such as bothering, hectoring, harassing, or otherwise pressuring someone to complete previously discussed demands or follow recommendations.

Nagging is a typical type of persuasion that is employed in all sectors of life, including the home and the workplace. Although it is a popular tactic used to avoid more aggressive persuasion techniques such as threats, it is never a way to communicate respectfully.

These and more are logical, dictionary, and philosophical definitions of nagging, but the act of nagging is one of the most appalling modes of human communication because of how frustrating it gets.

Nagging obstructs good communication and can interfere with emotional closeness and intimacy with your special person. These actions tend to push the opposite sex away rather than draw them closer to you, resulting in relationship distance and conflict.

Nagging isn’t the ideal strategy to keep a good relationship, achieve what you want, and meet your needs. Nagging stems from your dissatisfaction with feeling unheard, and it frequently provokes defensiveness from your partner.

It usually does not work and is aggravating to your partner, even if you assume that repeating what you want and making pleas several times or in different ways will get you what you want.

In whatsoever form of relationships you coexist in, you have every right to ask for what you want or need and to express your concerns openly, but it’s critical to be mindful of your communication and your position in the nagging cycle.

You must learn ways to control your anger.

Positive delivery and communication skills are essential for attaining what you desire. How you deliver your message has a significant impact on your partner’s receptivity and readiness to listen.

In an uncomfortable situation, focus on using communication to bring people together toward collaboration while letting go of nagging tendencies.

Both parties must exercise active listening while the other is speaking for transparent communication to occur. You’re nagging if either of you starts complaining or giving orders as though the other person’s viewpoint doesn’t matter.

When you can’t seem to have a productive talk without shifting blame away from yourself or when you feel the need to talk your partner down at every turn, you’re nagging. In the long run, whatever you needed to achieve will end up futile.

These are 15 ways to stop nagging and get what you want. They are highlighted below:

1. SHOW GRATITUDE AND BE APPRECIATIVE

Keep your emphasis on the positive by saying thank you and letting him know how much you appreciate what he does.

Gratitude is a big asset in the health of your relationship since it fuels love, happiness, and positivity.

Read 10 Ways To Show Gratitude To God.

2. TAKE ON A PROACTIVE APPROACH TO SITUATIONS

Refrain from criticizing your partner, calling him/her names, or making personal attacks.

Your significant other should engage with you, listen, and sometimes compromise if you go about it the right way.

3. ARTFULLY TRAIN YOUR PARTNER INSTEAD OF NAGGING

If table manners and orderliness are concerns, for example, and you want your partner to put more effort into being more courteous and orderly, show him what you want.

This method is another option for you and your partner to work together to improve your relationship. You, however, must be polite and respectful.

4. STOP NAGGING; BE ACTIVE IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP

Constantly support your partner and make sure you’re doing the same things you want him to do.

Please make sure you’re on the same page regarding expectations and work together to get it done, rather than blaming him for not doing it. 

5. CREATE THE RIGHT ENVIRONMENT FOR OPEN DIALOGUE

Instead of avoiding the subject matter, losing your cool, or sounding like a broken record, actively discuss your relationship.

Rather than moaning and reiterating the same thing over and again, express your concerns to your partner directly.

You may need to read 15 Dangers of Unforgiveness.

6. BE CLEAR AND PRECISE TO GET WHAT YOU WANT

Be open to letting your partner in on what you require and why you require it. Don’t assume he knows what you’re talking about.

Make it clear and show how important your request is. Don’t assume that your partner cares, understands, or listens. Respectfully seek an explanation for anything that seems unclear.

7. CONSTANTLY SHOW ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

When someone does anything for you, it’s crucial to make them feel valued.

Your partner, like you, deserves to be acknowledged and supported.

15 Simple Ways To Add More Value To Yourself

8. IT’S OKAY TO SOFTEN UP

Oftentimes, due to pressure, demands are met with a defensive attitude which can result in nagging.

Approach your partner with gentleness if you need or desire something from them. A real ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ will go a long way.

9. LISTEN WHEN YOU START GETTING COMPLAINTS 

One person is all it takes to name the nagging conduct. Even if you don’t mean to nag, if the other person thinks you are, your behaviour is possibly nagging.

It’s advisable to review how you communicate with such a person if they seem irritated.

It can feel unfair to be called a nag, and it probably is. Most likely, all you want for your partner or family is the best.

If they don’t listen to you, it’s best to try an alternative method of communication other than nagging.

Read 9 Tips for Compassionate Listening.

10. HAVE AN INTENTIONAL CONVERSATION 

This will help you figure out what you’re doing to irritate them.

Listen to what they have to say about the situation, and then collaborate to figure out how to proceed.

This will aid in communicating in a better manner and also identify the key difficulties.

11. EXPLAIN HOW YOU FEEL WHEN YOU’RE NOT BEING LISTENED TO

When your partner or family refuses to do what you ask, they are most likely not considering your point of view.

Sharing your feelings with them can help to change that.

Explain why you feel the need to make repeated requests and reminders, and how it makes you feel when the requests go unfinished.

This is one of the ways to show respect to others and there is much importance in respecting others.

12. CREATE A PLAN FOR MORE EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION

Work out a plan with your partner or family to know what you both want.

Inquire about how you can make a request or remind them to do something in a way that isn’t bothersome to them.

Similarly, be willing to let people choose when and how they do what they are most comfortable doing.

13. MAKE EYE CONTACT WHEN MAKING A REQUEST

If you ask your partner or children to do something while you look away, they might not think it’s vital.

Stop what you’re doing and look them in the eyes to let them know you’re talking to them and whatever you want is important.

15 Behaviors That Destroy Relationships

14. AVOID STRONG OUTRIGHT CRITICISM WHEN THINGS ARE NOT DONE YOUR WAY

Even if you have the ideal system for getting things done, it’s natural for others to have their preferences.

If you force someone to do things your way, they may become irritated and may no longer want you around them. Sometimes, allow them to do things their way.

15. ALWAYS SAY THANK YOU EVEN WHEN THEY DON’T GET IT PERFECTLY

This will show them that you appreciate their efforts and will inspire them to keep doing what you ask. 

Give them a genuine thank you as soon as you get what you want.

It is only normal that your act of gratitude will encourage them to do even more. Appreciating others is one of the tips on how to build self-confidence.

CONCLUSION

We’re more prone to nag if our requirements aren’t addressed. We are more likely to nag when we are feeling insecure. We resort to nagging to acquire what we want if we believe we are powerless.

Nagging falls under the category of passive/aggressive behaviours which are people’s default positions when they lack power. This is understandable but not acceptable because there is only so much someone can accommodate. Besides, nagging is one behaviour that can destroy relationships.

One of the points not mentioned in the main body is the advantage of ‘getting some help’, you can hire some help to lighten the load. You may pay someone to fix things for you.

It is simple to order groceries these days, and perhaps your partner would be willing to pick them up. Look for ways to split the workload. Consider the tasks that are dragging you down for a moment and devise strategies to reduce and eliminate stress.

When you’re inclined to nag, pause for a second and ask yourself, “Does this matter?” Is this significant? Is there anything else I can focus on to make a difference? Is it just my attempt to exert control?

It’s important to remember that nagging can be detrimental to a relationship and can cause resentment. Instead, try to communicate your concerns in a calm and respectful manner and work together to find a solution.