15 WAYS TO PROTECT YOUR HOME FROM THIRD-PARTY INTERFERENCE IN MARRIAGE

Every spouse wants a successful marriage. However, marriage is said to be great when it is free from the interference of any kind. Aside from human interference, there are other things that could interfere with marriage such as social media, television, games and even negative emotions like anger. These are just a few.

Every marriage is prone to interference but your willingness to overcome all these is called protection. When you are successful with this and free from third-party interference, there is this feeling of happiness and satisfaction in your marriage.

Nobody wants to have intruders in their marriage. However, besides praying about it, we need to work out ways to protect your marriage from third party interference because “faith without work is dead”.

So, I am going to dive into what you can do to protect your marriage from all kinds of interference. But first, I need you to concentrate because what I am about to tell you can change your marriage for the best if and if only you will put these into practice.

1) COMMUNICATION:

Okay! I know you want to protect your marriage from third party interference. But, I need you to ask yourself, “how is my communication life with my spouse?”

My tap has a little issue, water drips from it. So, I’ll have to wait till tomorrow before I can get a full bucket of water. But, when I turn on my tap, water flows very well. I don’t have to wait until tomorrow before I can get a full bucket.

What I am trying to say here is that your communication life with your spouse should be flowing not dripping. Flowing is normal but dripping is not. What you say to your spouse matters and how you say it also matters.

I just want to hope you are not shouting, Insulting or abusing your spouse. Your communication life cannot flow if you often shout, insult and mentally abuse your spouse. I grew up hearing my parents say that words are powerful. Words have the ability to change behaviour either positively or negatively. 

Words have the ability to secure your marriage. The way and manner you speak determine how I will react. If you are fond of insulting and abusing your spouse. Please stop! It’s a complete turn off to your spouse. You are only keeping a gap for a third party to interfere.

Also, if you have built a house in your mind to be hiding your concerns. Then! It’s high time you destroyed such a house. Your spouse is not God that should know your mind. Learn to speak your concerns in a polite way. When communication flows in your marriage, there is no room for third party interference.

2) LOVE:

Love is tied down with value. It is a feeling that is deeply rooted in the heart which induces values in you in such a way that you place your spouse above standard. When you are in love there is a limit to negative actions. There are some marriages that experience a breakdown after one year or more and the majority are caused by third-party interference.

Third-party interference occurs when there is infidelity which spouses often complain of and when you ask these adulterers, “do you love your wife?”  You will get a Yes or No answer. The truth is if you are an adulterer and you say a Yes answer to this question then you are far-fetched because the characteristic of Love does not include cheating. So that is not Love.

But if you say No! I don’t love my spouse, then you are right because hatred is one of the major reasons for third party interference in your marriage. In other to protect your home against interference by a person(s), you must learn to value your home. Value entails loyalty, commitment, honesty, reliability, dependability etc. When you love your spouse, you must endure each other because marriage is the coming together of two imperfect persons with the aim of loving and understanding each other.

Sometimes, temptations fly in to test your love for your spouse and when this happens, do not ever get tired of your spouse. Create beautiful memories of your spouse in your mind during your quiet time to remind you of the good times. Create photo and video memories of your spouse.

Memories also help build your home and strengthen Love. When you have the characteristics of Love in you and you display them in your home, then there would be no room for intruders.

3) RESPECT:

Nobody jokes with your home when you do not joke with your home. You can protect your home against third party interference when you respect your spouse. You have to constantly practice how to respect your spouse’s opinions and feeling without being intimidated.

Your home is open to intruders when all you do is disrespect your spouse. Your spouse should be held in high esteem. It is not enough to award your spouse as a sign of respect but your single act of giving them attention and never hurting her feelings.

Stop calling your spouse an idiot even if it is a joke because it diminishes your act of respect and it is never good for your kids to be influenced by this. When your spouse says something negative, avoid returning insults back and forth like a swing. You do not need to drink twenty bottles of olive oil to protect your home from third party interference. Respect does the magic and should be taken into consideration.

4) UNDERSTANDING:

One thing you must know is that marriage is between two imperfect persons coming together with the aim of understanding each other. When it comes to decision making, you will have to fit into your spouse’s shoes to understand why he or she makes a particular decision. You have to learn to understand your spouse’s feelings when there is a misunderstanding.

For you to understand your spouse, do not only see a meaningful point from your angle alone but also learn to look at your spouse’s angle too. When it is difficult to understand your spouse, ask questions that will aid your understanding. Do not give room to a third party to help you understand your spouse. It is your work, you have to do this to protect your home.

5) FORGIVENESS:

The things that seem little to you and thus you overlook it is the main reason your home is open to third-party interference. When your spouse apologizes to you, do not reject the apology. Forgiveness should constantly be your habit. It is not enough to forgive but to free your mind from a wrong done.

For you to know that your mind is free with your spouse is when you do not remind him of those things he did wrong. Forgiveness is another way of saying, I understand that you are not perfect but what will make your marriage look perfect is when you practice forgiveness.

6) APPRECIATION:

Everybody loves to be appreciated. I mean you feel loved when someone appreciates you for being a rare gem. You do not have to wait for your spouse’s death before you can say all the good things about him. Learn to appreciate and praise your spouse while alive. Say the good things that you admire about him/her.

Your relationship with your spouse should be like that of Christ and the Church. You simply walk into the church and appreciate God, you call Him sweet names, you jump, dance and celebrate God but you do not practice celebrating your spouse that you constantly see with your eyes. Celebrating or appreciating your spouse does not mean that you should throw a big party for him.

All you need do is to say those nice things that you love about him. Your marriage should not be boring. Do not keep a pit hole for your marriage to fall in. Learn to level the ground in your marriage by just celebrating your spouse this would help your marriage stand firm against a barrier.

7) SATISFACTION:

A satisfying marriage is like a balanced diet but to get a satisfying marriage, you must, first of all, be contented with your home. Marriage intruders are often seen in homes that are not contented with what they have. As a spouse, you need to be contented with your fellow spouse; you should not look outside marriage.

You must learn to be satisfied with the little things your spouse can afford for you. When you are satisfied with your home, you will not listen to the negative opinions of outsiders about your home.

8) CRITICISM/NAGGING:

This is one of the major pit holes that swallow marriage. When all you do is to criticize and nag at your spouse, then other people will have to join the train and do the same thing. You should flag your spouse well. Stop nagging; it’s really not good for the mental health.

Nobody is perfect, so what is the point of criticizing your spouse? All I can say is that you are not solving a problem by doing that but you are rather adding to your problems. Criticism can cause harm to your marriage. It will hurt your spouse’s feelings. Just express your feelings like, “Dear! The negative words you said earlier today, I know you were upset but I’m hurt and I’m finding it difficult to concentrate” instead of saying, “You have never said anything good in this house, you are just an ingrate”.

The earlier expresses your feeling in a nice way but the latter is a judgement passed on your spouse and it is raw. Stop finding fault in every single thing your spouse does. You need a stable marriage, free of interference by any person then you should avoid criticism and nagging.

9) SPEND TIME IN YOUR HOME:

When you constantly spend time with your home, there would be no room for home breakers. When you do not spend time with your family, it becomes difficult for you to understand your spouse. You will accept whatever opinion you hear from outsiders about your spouse reason being that you do not know your spouse well. After God, your home should be your priority; you should be available for your family at all times.

10) CO-OPERATION:

Some spouses have the aim of competing with each other in Marriage. In marriage, your spouse’s happiness should be your happiness reason being that when you win he or she wins too. Marriage is all about cooperation and doing things together irrespective of gender. When there is no cooperation amongst you two then you are not protecting your home against intruders.

11) FINANCE YOUR HOME:

The third party finds a way to interfere with your marriage when you do not constantly finance your home. Your spouse should not have to ask an outsider to finance your home when you are away. When this happens, you will be inviting a heap of intruders into your home.

Your spouse should know the amount of money in your account and you two should be able to budget for expenses and know how you spend money. Avoid being stingy with your spouse.

12) VIOLENT BEHAVIOURS:

If you are a violent type, you will have to consistently practice how to be tactful when handling misunderstandings. Your marriage will be intruded on by a person when your behaviour is bad.

Any behaviour that affects the health of your spouse should be struck out. Do not make your spouse see any reason to run to a third party for safety. Your home should be safe and well protected by you evidenced in your behaviour.

13) SURPRISE:

Instead of inviting people to interfere with your marriage by your negative conduct, let people stand from afar and smell the success of your marriage. Your marriage should be full of surprises; you should constantly apply different ways to make your spouse happy. How about taking your spouse out for a picnic? Always ask your spouse what your spouse wishes for you to do for him or her.

Do not wait until it is Christmas or your spouse’s birthday before you can surprise him or her with gifts. You have to constantly remind your spouse how much you love him or her. Try doing new things, for instance as a husband, try weaving or washing your wife’s hair.

As a wife, try knotting your husband’s tie or brush his hair and do nice things that would surprise him or her. By doing beautiful things like this, you are only securing your home against third party interference.

14)  ENCOURAGEMENT:

When your home is faced with challenges, learn to encourage your spouse. Give your spouse hope when faced with problems. You should be a cheerleader to your spouse. When you let an outsider do you work for you, you will end up losing your marriage to an outsider.

15) FUN:

It is not all about keeping a serious face at home that will make a successful marriage. You need to go have fun together. Learn to play with your spouse. Visit cinemas, and the gym and play games together. When your spouse is your playmate and everything, there would be no room for any person to intrude in your marriage.

In conclusion, protecting your home against third party interference is evident in your actions. Your actions induce reactions from intruders. Your actions should not be a fire that destroys your home but a refining fire that brings out the gold in your marriage. Make your spouse your best friend, your gist partner, playmate and everything.